Life is a series of typically boring patterns. So it comes as no surprise that sex is one of them.
Back in middle school, actually fingering a girl was a real feat. Most guys got around to feeling girls up back then, with the pussy being goal in high school. In college, they'd get drunk and experiment around, feeling all dirty and guilty the next day. Further on, people got married and settled in for fucking boring ass missionary and all that shit. For a little fun, there might be a blowjob thrown in there or something. Hardee-har-har, what fun.
Seriously, though: FUCK THAT SHIT.
Following my initiation into Sir-Mix-A-Lot's fellowship, I sought to explore the booty in greater detail. It wasn't until I hooked up with a perfect 10 girl that I really got into the butthole. She was so hot that I could not imagine anything foul ever coming from her body, and curiously threw a pair of digits up her butt one night as I ate her out. As the wind whistled outside in the -30 Michigan night, she moaned with pleasure in the guest bedroom on the third floor of her parents' house, her mother one floor below blissfully aware. Her daughter was experiencing pleasures beyond her wildest dreams as she watched Desperate Housewives. It is one of the moments that I cherish and relive every day when I close my eyes.
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